Children’s books are supposed to be uplifting stories that teach children valuable life lessons that will hopefully stick with them for the rest of their life.
These are not those books.
- “Go the F**k to Sleep”
Subtlety is not this author’s forte.
- “Harpo’s Horrible Secret”
Trending: 5 Ways to Ruin Your Life
Something tells me it’s got something to do with Grandpa standing uncomfortably close.
- “Where Willy Went…”
For parents who don’t believe in lying to their kids about the stork.
- “The Night Dad Went To Jail”
This is just… Why?
- “My First Cavity Search”
This makes me uncomfortable for a multitude of reasons.
- “Why Is Mommy Moaning?”
The fact that it’s a “’First Time” book is probably not helping the awkward factor.
- “Don’t Make Me Go Back, Mommy”
“A child’s book about satanic ritual abuse.” Honestly not a sentence I’d ever thought I’d read.
- “My Mom Has Hepatitis C”
Horrifying. Simply horrifying.
- “I Wish Daddy Didn’t Drink So Much”
Owning this book is a cry for help.
- “Good-bye, Testicles”
Might as well wish your innocence goodbye while you’re at it.