All sorts of things get defined as “Red Pill,” but if you cut all the way down to the heart of the matter, it’s really just a better way of explaining gender dynamics. People who buy into the Red Pill look at the way the conventional/Blue Pill/Tradcon explains why men and women do what they do and they believe the map better fits the territory. In my humble opinion, they’re right.
That is mostly because the traditional way of looking at gender relations is running off of a script that has been out of date for 75 years. Back when women were getting married at 22 to get financial support, infrequently had sex outside of marriage and divorce was stigmatized, the Tradcon way of looking at the world didn’t work perfectly, but it produced a fairly good outcome for a large number of people.
Fast forward to 2020 when people are marrying for love, sex outside of marriage is common and there’s no more stigma to divorce and the system has become much more dysfunctional.
That being said, it’s STILL the approach that most people in our culture take to love and marriage and while the shortcomings of it are often pointed out in the manosphere, it’s worth pointing out that it still works for the majority of people. About 45% of people get divorced, which means roughly 55% don’t. Additionally, statistics across many studies show that married people are happier than people that are single. It’s also worth adding that just about every statistical measure imaginable shows that a couple does a better job of raising a kid than a single parent. In other words, can Red Pill philosophy correctly point out the deficiencies of Blue Pill thinking? Sure, but it’s worth noting that most of the Blue Pill guys are still winning. If you’re a Blue Pill guy who gets married at 29, has 2.5 kids and lives with the wife in the house with the white picket fence until you have a heart attack and die at 82, you succeeded.
You’re not really going to get this impression from most people pushing Red Pill ideas. For example, this is a tweet from Rich Cooper. Incidentally, I LIKE Rich Cooper. I’m subscribed to his YouTube channel, I’ve interviewed him and I think he generally gives good advice.
An old man that doesn’t know anything how women operate once said: “Take her out for dinner & dancing”
— Richard Cooper (@Rich_Cooper) December 28, 2019
If you asked most Tradcon/Blue Pill guys what a date looks like and it would feature dinner and something. Dinner and a movie, dinner, and dancing, dinner and putt-putt golf or best of all, dinner and heading back to your place. Are there women who will go out with a guy just to get dinner? Absolutely. I’ve met them before, but they’re obviously in the minority. I thought about all that as I was reading this Tweet from Hunter Drew.
-We accept that we’re in marriage 2.0.
-We accept a Divorce Industry exists.
-We accept masculinity is deemed evil.
Yet for all that, we as a pro-masculine movement (Manosphere) cannot accept that an involved father should garner positive attention.
Guess I’m out of the club.
— Hunter Drew (@HunterDrewTFA) December 30, 2019
One thing that I don’t agree with about the Red Pill is the approach to marriage. Theoretically, it’s pro-marriage. In fact, the “Godfather of Red Pill” Rollo Tomassi (I’m also a fan of Rollo’s work) is married and has said he thinks men and women are better together than apart. However, if you move out of the “theoretical” into the actual practical approach to marriage taken by most Red Pill aficionados, it’s not just “no,” it’s “hell no.” There is no Red Pill push for any man to get married at all and if anything, there seems to be a deep skepticism about the whole idea.
If you want to know why there’s a difference between the theoretical approach and the practical approach, a lot of it seems to have to do with marketing. You see, if you tried to split the sort of people who are interested in Red Pill philosophy into two groups, one would probably be guys who want to get better with women. The other group of people are guys that got burned somehow. Maybe they’ve always been bad with women, got their heart broken or were divorce raped and got angry at women about it. So they’re upset, they’re hostile and they’re looking for justification for their attitude. If that’s the split and you’re pushing Red Pill ideas, how do you square the circle? You say marriage is okay theoretically, but as a practical matter, you crap on it every chance you get.
The problem with that approach is that ultimately it’s long road to nowhere.
You could have this but you keep thinking notch number 137 will finally fill that hole in your soul so you keep doing pickup. https://t.co/I80fS5g210
— Tanner Guzy (@tannerguzy) December 26, 2019
The thing about the Red Pill is that it’s fantastic at pointing out problems, but not necessarily so good at coming up with long-term solutions. For most human beings, at some point, one night stands, spinning plates and viewing women as tail gets old. For example, how happy does Roosh sound about his incredible success with women?
Unquestionably, men should be pushing to fix marriage, but you can also make the argument that the alternative to that is spending an empty, childless life moving from fling to eventually disappointed girlfriends to flings. There’s a lot to be said for being a good dad and the day men can’t acknowledge and support that is the day our whole society starts to go down the tubes.