As a man, I just don’t care very much about the ceremony surrounding a wedding. Personally, if and when I get married, I would be totally content to elope to Vegas, take a few pictures and get on to the honeymoon without blowing an enormous amount of money.
I understand that women don’t always see it this way. They want the big church, the fancy dresses, a day where they wear white, where everyone looks at them and it all has to be perfect.
Still, some people in the “world revolves around me” culture that we live in take this whole thing way, way too far. When they talk about their “perfect” day, they don’t feel like there are limits to what they can ask of other people. For example…
So, i’m in the middle of a shitstorm and need some advice on if i’m wrong.
My sister is getting married in less that 3 weeks. I haven’t been involved in the planning as I have my own life but from what my mom has relaid to me it’s been a nightmare. My sister want’s a “fancy” wedding and is micro-managing everything. I have no idea how normal this is but from what i’ve heard she broke down crying when her fiance bought the wrong shade of white napkins. Her and both my and the grooms parents have invested a lot of money into this too the tune of over 50k.
In my opinion I think the whole ordeal is ridiculous but it’s not really my place to say anything. At least until yesterday. A email was sent out to everyone invited to the wedding with “attendance requirements”. These requirements were a joke. Some of them were just nonsensical like what color ties are and aren’t allowed or that no one can talk to the wife or groom alone. But some were absurd like the fact that no one is supposed to take pictures except the photographer for the whole event, no facial hair will be allowed or you will not be pictured, or that any women with shoulder length or longer hair must have it cut or wear it in a pony tail. The worst though were the “gift requirements”. According to the email a gift of 300$ value or more MUST be given (or $250 cash) or you will not be allowed into the venue. The email also ends with “Those who choose not to follow these rules will be asked to leave. Please think of the bride and groom’s wishes during this stressful time”
This is a joke, right? Like I can understand micromanaging but that’s just absurd. I called my mom to make sure this was not a late April fools joke and it was real. I told her that I won’t be going because of this. That was wrong apparently because my sister has been blowing me up saying that I’m being selfish and that i’m ruining “her day:. My parents agree with her and say i’m being an asshole. My parents have told me that they will pay for my gift but I still think that all of these rules are a joke.
Would I be an ass if I skipped out on the wedding?
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First of all, $50k for a wedding? I hope they have money to burn if they’re blowing a wad of cash that size on it.
Then there are the requirements. No facial hair or you can’t be in any pictures. Cut your hair or put it in a ponytail. $250 cash or a minimum of a $300 gift? The sense of entitlement is mind-blowing and it doesn’t speak well of her character. Neither does the fact that her parents are defending her behavior because it’s an indication she wasn’t raised right.
So, is her brother justified in skipping this wedding? You bet. Of course, the person who should really be worried is the groom because this kind of behavior is a huge red flag. If she behaves this way over the wedding, is she going to be a huge spender? Is she going to be impossible to please? Is she going to be this unreasonable when there’s a big decision to be made? Be careful, because this kind of behavior isn’t just going to just show up during her wedding.