Before we get started on this, it’s worth explaining what being “blackpilled” means. The Urban Dictionary does as good a job as anyone:
A state of mind brought upon by the realization of harsh truths: seeing reality/society for what it truly is beyond the illusion of “equality” we are led to believe. It is the understanding that life is ultimately unfair and that “winners” and “losers” are determined, for the most part, by circumstances beyond one’s control (looks, wealth, mental condition, height, race, family, luck, etc.). The despair that arises from taking in the blackpill can be crippling and might drive some to the brink of insanity (thus the expression: Cope or Rope).
Another way to put it is that this is someone who has given up after concluding that the deck is stacked against them in life because of factors outside of their control. If you want a psychological term, it’s essentially “learned helplessness.”
How I’m supposed to leave the blackpill?
I’m a overthinking person, and I can’t just stop believing blackpill, it’s like telling a Catholic to Just stop believing on Bible without even trying to prove him that it’s wrong,
What i mean is, I can’t leave backpill, without proofs that it’s wrong, that a short, depressed ugly guy with problems to gain mass with 111 lbs, don’t gonna end up dying alone
It’s easy to make fun of blackpilled guys because they’re associated with the incel community, but this sort of errant thinking is actually very common. You see it all the time in people that are depressed, anxious, have a mental illness, have low self-esteem in the body positivity movement, in people that blame all their failures on some kind of “ism” — it goes on and on.
People have a problem, they tell themselves it’s completely genetic or how the world is and they do absolutely nothing about it. This excuse is nearly always bullsh*t because there is almost always something you can do to improve the situation.
Depression is a pretty typical one. “Oh, my brain chemistry makes me depressed.” That may be true in some cases. But, are you doing things that help keep your brain chemistry on an even keel? Getting enough sleep? Eating the right things? Taking walks? Getting out in nature? Are you working on your thinking? Because I have heard so many people tell me their brain chemistry makes them depressed and then they proceed to say the meanest, most unfair things you’ve ever heard about themselves. So, you’re openly saying you’re a bad person, you’re garbage, you’re worthless, but the real problem is genetic? It doesn’t sound like it, bro.
The three key things to think about in this situation are…
1) Does this belief serve you? If you believe something, is it a good and helpful for you to believe that? If the answer is “no,” then start challenging that belief and see what happens. You think you’re “ugly?” Okay, then maybe you get a new haircut. Maybe you should learn to dress. Maybe you should hit the gym and get ripped.
Do you believe you can’t gain mass? Well, have you asked some of the buff guys at the gym how to get bigger? Have you watched YouTube videos or read books by professionals? You can DEFINITELY add mass. Of course, not everybody does it as well or as easily as other people. So maybe what you need to do is consider a different angle. Should you be trying to build mass or should you be tackling something like distance running or rock climbing where your lack of mass is an advantage?
2) Are you focusing on what you can do or your limitations? Life is not about what you can’t do, it’s about what you can do. When you spend all your time focused on your weaknesses and what you lack, it keeps you from thinking about what you can accomplish.
3) What are you feeding into your mind? What questions do you repeat in your mind? “Why am I such a loser? Why do I always screw up everything up? Why am I such a bad person?” Your brain will answer those questions for you. Would you rather have those answers or… “How can I make more money?” “What could I do to make myself more attractive?” “What’s the #1 thing I could do right now to improve my life?” Are you on an incel forum where everyone is talking about how life sucks and is unfair or are listening to people like Tony Robbins and David Goggins telling you to improve your life? What are you inputting into your brain on a daily basis? Are people on Twitter insulting you? Hentai? Are you watching commercials for stuff you don’t need? How about self-help books? Online lessons teaching you how to build new skills? The contents of a Jar of Awesome?
Everybody wants an instant solution, but unfortunately, everything worthwhile in life usually ends up being a step at a time process. You get a little better and a little better, make a mistake, improve, take a great leap forward, fall back, realize you might be able to do some things you didn’t expect, get distracted, improve and end up somewhere you never thought you’d be.
Long story short, if you want to get out of that mindset, stop doing the things that got you into it and start doing what successful people do.