He Wants to Know if He Should Just Give Up and be an Incel?

I get why people think this way, but

I’m just going to give up

I’m fundamentally broken at the personality level and the sheer amount of work it would take to even have a chance at opening a dialogue like “do you want to go out with me”, is something I can’t manage.

Instead of ending it all I think I’m just going to resign myself to escapist lies and avoid the issue until I die. Or until you can dump your brain into the internet which will most likely not be in my lifetime.

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I don’t want to be alone but I’ve always been.

When you’re deep in the valley and feel like you are way behind other people in some area, getting to where you want to be seems like an insurmountable task because there are so many things you can’t see from where you are.

So, how do you get out? You have to believe that you can and start taking steps. As you improve and get better, new possibilities will just start to appear. If you feel like you are starting at ground zero with women, then start taking the small steps.

  1. Do you need therapy? Cool, accept that you have an issue, and work on it with a therapist just like you’d work on a broken bone with a doctor.
  2. Start talking to every woman you run into. Old, young, cashiers, cute, ugly — just conversationally. Don’t do it with an outcome in mind. Just be friendly and see what happens.
  3. Find someone you know, someone you don’t, or even just do research and start developing a little style in how you dress.
  4. Groom yourself. Get rid of those long eyebrow hairs. Make sure there’s no ear or nose hair sticking out. Take a shower. Stop chewing your nails.
  5. Go to the gym. Start lifting. Add a little muscle on.
  6. Get social. Go out with friends. If you don’t have friends, go to a meetup group and try to make some.
  7. Go listen to some YouTube videos or read some ebooks about picking-up women and building self-esteem or confidence.
  8. Pursue an interesting hobby. Jiu-jitsu, playing the guitar, wine tasting, CrossFit, etc, etc, etc.

I could keep going, but the point isn’t “do 1-8 and you will get a girlfriend,” it’s to keep stacking little things like this and one day, you’ll be out of that valley and seeing new possibilities that will lead to having a girlfriend appear in your life. The key to it is either having enough faith or desperation to get started and keep going.

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John Hawkins
John Hawkins created Rightwingnews.com in 2001; built it up to a top 10,000 in the world website; created a corporation with more than 20 employees to support it; created a 3.5 million person Facebook page; became one of the most popular conservative columnists in America; was published everywhere from National Review to Human Events, to Townhall, to PJ Media, to the Daily Wire, to The Hill; wrote a book 101 Things All Young Adults Should Know that was at one point top 50 in the self-help section on Amazon; did hundreds of hours as a guest on radio shows, raised $611,000 in a GoFundMe for Brett Kavanaugh’s family and has been talked about everywhere from The New York Times to Buzzfeed, to the Washington Post, to Yahoo News, to the Rush Limbaugh Show, to USA Today. After seeing the unjust way that Brett Kavanaugh was treated during his hearings and how a lifetime worth of good work was put at risk by unprovable allegations, John Hawkins decided to create a men’s website. Welcome to Brass Pills!

 

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